Monday, July 10, 2017

Eulogy for Dad

On April 30, 2017 Dad passed away.  He was 101 years old.

Willard Clinton Inscoe
October 20, 1915 - April 30, 2017

At his graveside service, I shared this eulogy:

Thank all of you for coming out this beautiful morning to help us celebrate Dad's life.  
  
Dad was born in 1915. Today, we cannot imagine what life was like then. Especially the Great Grandchildren, Anna, Evan and Olivia who are here today.

  • Women did not have the right to vote.
  • It was just 12 years since the first airplane flight.
  • The first coast to coast telephone call was made that year.
  • Social Security didn't exist.
  • It was two years before World War I.
  • Only 2 million cars on the road (today there are over 250 million) and the Model T was the car of the day and cost $440.
  • Annual Household income was $687.
  • Sears sold kit homes in their catalogs. For instance, you could purchase their two-story, seven room “Phoenix” model for only $1,271.00. The kit had all the materials needed to build the house, including paint. 
  • You could buy a car at Sears Roebuck.
  • Average annual wage was $647.
That is what Dad was born into.

Over a lifetime of over 101 years, he saw incredible change.

The change that probably baffled him the most was being able to SEE his Great Grandchildren, Anna, Evan and Olivia while talking to them on the phone.  He never figured that one out – nor have I for that matter.

Nor could he figure out how Clara takea picture of him with her IPAD and immediately showing him the picture.

He was born at home near Castalia.  

His family were all farmers.  

He had 8 brothers and sisters.  He outlived them all – and I wondered many times if he might outlive me.  

He did outlive his daughter, Willettie.

Willettie had two sons – Christopher who now lives in Wilmington, and Anthony, who has lived with and cared for Dad for the past several years.  No one will ever know or appreciate what he did for Dad.

We have often commented that without Anthony, Dad would not have enjoyed nor perhaps would not have lived these past few years.  

Anthony, I appreciate everything you did for Dad.

I don't know much about Dad's early childhood.

Going through some of the stuff we found in shoe boxes, I came upon Dad's 2nd grade report card from 1923.  Even then, Dad excelled.  He had all one's on reading spelling writing, drawing and arithmetic.  For you grandchildren, one's were todays A's

I've often heard him tell the story of driving a school bus when he was 15 years old.  

And of course he, along with his siblings worked long hard days on the farm.

In 1937, he married a neighbor, Clara Gertrude Wester.  Mom died in 1994

They were married for 55 years.

In 1941, he joined the Army and served in the South Pacific.

Another oft repeated story that he relished telling was about his trip on a ship across the Pacific.

As the story goes, according to Dad: They were in the middle of the ocean and a bunch of guys were talking about they were a thousand miles from land. Dad piped up and said “You guys are closer to land than that.  We're less than a mile from land”  “Willard, you're crazy”.  Then he told them “Guys look down, its only a mile to the bottom of the ocean, and that's land”  

At that point, they threatened to throw him overboard and let him swim to that land.

I know I've heard that story at least 100 times.

After World War 2, he knew he didn't want to be a farmer, so in 1947 he went to barber school in Durham

When he had graduated, he joined the Ferrell – Mullins Barber shop on main street in Nashville.

Eventually, he owned the shop.

I'll always remember those days when as a kid of probably 12 or so, I started working in the barber shop as a shoe shine boy.  

I was working right along beside Dad after school and on Saturdays, shining shoes for a dime, making maybe $5 a week and thinking I was rich.  

For the privilege of working as a shoe shine boy, I also had to sweep up the hair that had been cut. This was my introduction to the fact that old men have white hair – there was certainly a lot of it on the floor.

Dad and Mom had started a family.  I was the second child, born in 1944.  Before me they had a boy, Jackie who died soon after birth.  

Willettie was born in 1948.

In 1948, Mom and Dad bought a lot on East Virginia Ave in Nashville, and built the home that he lived in until this past Sunday.

I can remember as a child and teenager, every Sunday afternoon, we piled into the car and headed to Castalia to visit family.  It seems that everyone except us stayed at home on Sunday's, because they were always there Sunday afternoon.  

This continued for decades.  Even after Clara and I were married, if we were home on Sunday afternoon, off we went to visit family.

There must have been a half dozen stops on these Sunday afternoon trips.  And it seemed that someone would always have lunch or dinner prepared.

Dad never made much money as a barber, but he and Mom did manage to send both Willettie and I to college – the first kids in the family to ever go beyond high school.  

I don't know how they did it, but I do remember that Willettie and I both had to work  while we attended NC State COLLEGE.  Mom and Dad paid the tuition, but we had to work for all our spending money.

I've always been grateful for this education, but more than the education, I met this pretty young girl in Raleigh who was going to X-Ray tech school at Wake Memorial Hospital and she became my wife.

After Willettie and I left home, Mom and Dad (as empty nesters – which no one in that day referred to as that) were active in their church (Nashville Baptist) and the community.  Their lives always revolved around the church.

I can remember often having the pastor come to lunch after Sunday church services or coming over when Dad made ice cream.

David (Pope), minister at Rock Creek Baptist Church, related to me just yesterday that on one of his early visits to Rock Creek, he had lunch at Dad's

I know that Dad stayed very active in a lot of clubs and groups, including the Veterans of Foreign Wars.  I accompanied him to several VFW meetings in the recent past and know he really enjoyed them.

Dad owned the barber shop downtown and eventually, he RETIRED sometime in the 1980's..  But retirement didn't mean to him what it does to Clara and I.

He built a room on to his house on Virginia Avenue and set up barbering there for probably another 25 years.

He was forced to retire from barbering when he was 97 years old because of a broken bone.  At that time, he was the oldest practicing Barber in North Carolina and from what we've been told, the second oldest in the United States, having been a practicing barber over 65 years.

There are many people whose lives were touched by Dad.  

Over the years, he was always trying to help “the old people”, even when he was in his 90's.  It always amused me that many of the “old People” were as much as a couple decades younger, but to him, they were always the “old people”.

We will always be grateful to the many people who have helped Dad, especially in these last few years.

First and foremost is Anthony, who has faithfully been his caregiver.  I don't know how he did it.  We will always be grateful to Anthony for making it possible for Dad to stay in his home until the end.

And Barbara, his neighbor, renter, and dear friend.

And Barbara's family, who as many of you know, are too numerous to name.

And LeRoy, who always came by and checked on Dad, taking him to church or anywhere else he needed to go.

And Lula, who kept him company for hours when she came over and rode Dad's stationary bike (which he used for years)

And his niece Catherine Gupton, who became his “date” every Friday night when the “Friday night gang” went out to dinner.  

Catherine and Dad would always fuss with each other over who's night it was to pay.  They would always threaten to buy an expensive meal if it was the others night to pay.  I'm not sure who came out to the good with that.

And the Rock Creek Baptist Church family, who always welcomed him and prayed for him and with him.

There are many memories that are created over a century lifetime.  And there is just not enough time to tell the stories of all those memories.

I appreciate each of you for coming out today to honor my Dad.